A bloke goes into a baker’s and asks for three pork pies…

A bloke goes into a baker’s and asks for three pork pies. The

assistant picks the pies up with a pair of tongs and puts them

in a paper bag. The man then asks for three strawberry tarts

and the assistant picks up another pair of tongs and puts

three tarts into a bag.

“I must compliment you on such impressive hygienic

standards,” said the man.

“Thank you,” says the assistant. “We’re very careful not to

touch any of the food.”

Just as the man is leaving the shop, he notices a piece of

string hanging from the assistant’s trousers.

“Excuse me, what is that piece of string?” he asks.

“That’s used when I go to the toilet. So that I don’t touch my

penis. I pull it out with the string,” says the assistant.

“But how do you put it back?”

“Oh, I use one of these pairs of tongs.”

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