A man walks into the bar with a monkey and asks for 2 pints of beer…

A man walks into the bar with a monkey and asks for 2 pints

of beer.

“We don’t serve monkeys in here,” replies the barman.

“You’ll have to go elsewhere.”

“Oh come on, you can see how quiet he is, there’ll be no

trouble,” urges the man.

Eventually the barman gives in and 2 pints are placed on the

bar. However, it’s not long before the monkey starts to feel

the effects of the beer and he begins to get quite boisterous.

All of a sudden he swings over to the snooker table, picks up

the black ball and swallows it. The barman is outraged and

orders them both out immediately.

“Heh, I’m really sorry, mate. That ball will have to come out

at some point and then I’ll bring it straight back.” True to his

word, a couple of days later the man returns, accompanied

by the monkey on a lead and of course the black snooker

ball. He hands back the ball and orders a couple of pints.

“No way,” says the barman. “Who knows what trouble that

monkey of yours will cause this time.”

“No, no, I’ve got him on a lead now, nothing will happen,”

replies the man, so the barman serves them. The monkey sits

quietly on the stool, supping his beer and occasionally taking

a peanut from the dish on the bar. Each time he picks one

up, he first sticks it up his backside before putting it in his

mouth. The barman looks on astonished and turning to the

man he asks, “What’s with your monkey, why does he keep

doing that with the peanuts?”

“Oh it’s simple really, after the trouble with the black

snooker ball he likes to test the size of the food before he

eats it.”

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