A packet of condoms please…

“A packet of condoms please,” said the man to the sales


“What size, sir?” she asked.

“Er…I don’t know.”

“Well, that’s no problem,” she replied. “If you go into the

other room, you’ll find a board with a selection of different

holes. Just pop your todger in them until you find the right


So the man did as he was told, little realising that every time

he tried a different hole, the sales assistant was on the other

side fondling it. Eventually, he was satisfied he had found

the correct size, so returned to the counter.

“Everything alright, sir?” she asked.

“Couldn’t be better,” he replied, “but forget the condoms,

just sell me the board.”

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