What’s the similarity between Kodak and condoms?
They are both there to catch those special moments.
What’s the similarity between Kodak and condoms?
They are both there to catch those special moments.
In Britain and Ireland a rubber is what you use to correct mistakes made in pencil; in the US it’s called an eraser and a rubber is a condom. In Britain and Ireland a fag is a cigarette whereas in America they’re confused enough by this point and decide to take their sex tourism elsewhere.
I was lying in bed, having just had sex with my new girlfriend without a condom for the first time.
“You’re absolutely sure you’ve not got anything?” she asked for the fifth time.
“You’ve got nothing to worry about,” I replied, “3 of my last 4 HIV tests came back negative.”
100 people get the Swine Flu and everybody wants to wear a mask.
A million people have AIDS and no one wants to wear a condom!
How is a woman like a condom?
Both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.
16 years ago my condom split resulting in a beautiful little boy. Years later he has turned into an insolent, twattish teenager!
Anyone know how I can get in touch with The Terminator?
When I turned 16 my dad handed me a condom and said, ”There you go son, you’ll be needing this.”
”Thanks dad.” I replied, ”Are you sure mum is ok with this?”
”Of course, it was her idea.” He said, ”Now get upstairs while she’s still in the mood.”
When I came home and found my wife shagging a complete stranger in the living room, initially I was fuming.
Imagine my relief after she explained that he was just a door-to-door condom salesman demonstrating his wares.
What do you get with a corduroy condom?
A groovy kind of love.
How do faggots get a condom off?
They fart.