Your Honor, it was an accident! I had to run into the fence to keep from hitting the cow! Was it a Jersey cow? I dont know, I didnt see her license plate!

Why wouldnt anyone play with the little longhorn? He was too much of a bully!

Why was the calf afraid? He was a cow-herd!

Why was he woman arrested on a cattle ranch for wearing a silk dress? She was charged with rustling!

Why dont cows ever have any money? Because the farmers milk them dry!

Why doesnt Sweden export its cattle? It wants to keep its Stockholm!

Why do cows wear bells around their necks? Because their horns dont work.

Why do cows think cooks are mean? They whip cream!

Why do cows like being told jokes? Because they like being amoosed!

Why did the moron give the sleepy cow a hammer? He wanted her to hit the hay!