Category Archives: Lotto Jokes

Bloody Lottery!

I got really addicted a few years ago. Now, each week without fail I’ll use my credit card and do about 3 lines of the stuff. I don’t know how I’d get by without it. At first it gets me all really excited and anxious, but leaves me feeling used and low.

Bloody Lottery!

Go Fu*k yourself

“Just won the lottery. Me and Dave from across the road are at the airport, we’re moving to Paris. I’ve advised that half of the winnings be paid to you so you don’t come after me. Divorce papers are on their way, and you’re not Sally’s Dad. Go Fu*k yourself! Claire x”

Carlsberg don’t do text messages…