Dawn’s husband had just been cremated, the mourners had
gone home and she was left holding his ashes. She said to
the ashes, “Well, Dave, I’ve got a few things to say to you.
See this fancy ring on my finger, the one I always wanted
and the one you would never buy me? Well, I’ve bought it.
And you see this flashy leather handbag with matching
shoes? You always promised, but never got round to it. Well,
I’ve bought them too. She then tipped his ashes onto the
ground and blew on them, saying scornfully, “So there you
are, Dave, that’s the blow job you always wanted and never