I used to have a real bad bedwetting problem … but the last couple of weeks I’ve gotten it under control.
I know we just met and this might seem a little sudden … but could I borrow five hundred dollars?
Go ahead and Super Size – I found spare change in the sofa today.
Something tells me that you’re very special … but with medication I can usually ignore it.
I don’t see my ex-girlfriend that much … thanks to the U.S. Department of Justice.”
Do you want to play doctor? That’ll be five hundred dollars.
Wait till my wife hears about this!
I had a good time tonight. I’d love to see you again in six to eight months with good behavior.
I really don’t like this restaurant that much, but I wanted to use this 2-for-1 coupon before it expired.
People say I remind them of Eddie Haskell.
I used to come here all the time with my ex.
I never said you NEED a nose job. I just said it wouldn’t hurt to consider it.
Could you excuse me? My cat gets lonely if he doesn’t hear my voice on the answering machine every hour.
I like clay. It’s mushy.
I really feel that I’ve grown in the past few years. Used to be I wouldn’t have given someone like you a second look.
And I won that trophy in the inter-fraternity belching contest.
I know you said you don’t eat anything with a face. But a good butcher will cut that part off for you if you ask.
It’s been tough, but I’ve come to accept that most people I date just won’t be as smart as I am.