Worst Thing To Say On A First Date

I used to have a real bad bedwetting problem … but the last couple of weeks I’ve gotten it under control. 


I know we just met and this might seem a little sudden … but could I borrow five hundred dollars? 


Go ahead and Super Size – I found spare change in the sofa today. 


Something tells me that you’re very special … but with medication I can usually ignore it. 


I don’t see my ex-girlfriend that much … thanks to the U.S. Department of Justice.” 


Do you want to play doctor? That’ll be five hundred dollars. 


Wait till my wife hears about this! 


I had a good time tonight. I’d love to see you again in six to eight months with good behavior.


I really don’t like this restaurant that much, but I wanted to use this 2-for-1 coupon before it expired. 


People say I remind them of Eddie Haskell. 


I used to come here all the time with my ex. 


I never said you NEED a nose job. I just said it wouldn’t hurt to consider it. 


Could you excuse me? My cat gets lonely if he doesn’t hear my voice on the answering machine every hour. 


I like clay. It’s mushy. 


I really feel that I’ve grown in the past few years. Used to be I wouldn’t have given someone like you a second look. 


And I won that trophy in the inter-fraternity belching contest. 


I know you said you don’t eat anything with a face. But a good butcher will cut that part off for you if you ask. 


It’s been tough, but I’ve come to accept that most people I date just won’t be as smart as I am.

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